Joaquin Phoenix

Well I would like to start out by saying happy birthday to one of my favorite actors of all time, Ms. Julia Roberts.  She turns 44 today.  I was going to review one of her movies, but I know that I would be far to bias in my review.  I just love her work, and she can do no wrong in my book.  Ok, sorry about that.  Now onto our other actor celebrating a birthday today.

Joaquin Phoenix in Buffalo Soldiers 
Photo courtesy of http://www.allstarpics.net/0618313/012003184/buffalo-soldiers-2001-pic.html

Happy birthday to the man who "quit" acting, Joaquin Phoenix.  He turns 37 today.  I chose to do a movie that it seems no one knows about.  It's called Buffalo Soldiers and was made in 2001.  No, it has nothing to do with Bob Marley's song of the same name.  It's actually about Ray Elwood (Phoenix) who runs a black market for everything and anything, including homemade heroin (scandalous!), and his struggle with a Sgt. Lee whom they call "Top" (played by Scott Glenn).  Anna Paquin plays Phoenix's love interest who is also Glenn's daughter.
On with the movie.  I just don't know where to start with this movie.  The storyline was different and interesting, but the added romance was unnecessary.  The storyline also got became a little difficult to follow at times, but it was overall interesting.
The acting on the other hand...  It was painful to watch.  I thought that Phoenix was suppose to be a good actor, but I guess I was wrong.  Granted he did have some good scenes but those were sparse.
I wanted to like this movie, but I found it hard to like it.  Phoenix character was undeveloped, along with everyone else's characters, and the ending to the movie was a little hard to believe.  And with that, I raise my lighter to light the candles on Joaquin's cake.

I give this movie 1 ½ cakes out of 5.  It could have been 2 ½ cakes but the bad acting by Anna Paquin and others became distracting and brought this movie down.

Carrie Fisher

Tom Hanks (left) and Carrie Fisher in The Man with One Red Shoe
Photo courtesy of http://www.themoviescene.co.uk/reviews/the-man-with-one-red-shoe/the-man-with-one-red-shoe.html

Happy 55^th birthday to the queen of Star Wars, Carrie Fisher.  Today I chose to watch a movie that is in no way related to Star Wars.  I picked The Man with One Red Shoe from 1985.  When I chose this movie, I thought that Fisher had a large role.  Boy, was I wrong.  She is only on the screen for four scenes if you don't count her voice recordings.
Any who, on with the movie.  Carrie Fisher in this movie is a scene stealer.  She plays the wife of Jim Belushi, but is trying to start an affair with Tom Hanks (who wants nothing to do with her).  Her "Jane" outfit, when she goes to "seduce" Hanks, is top notch (see picture above).  For the Star Wars fans reading, this is your equivalent to the classic Princess Leia slave outfit for this movie.
Fisher also plays a good jealous woman.  There's a scene with the orchestra where Hanks is making eyes at Lori Singer and Fisher sees it.  You can just feel the jealousy radiating off of her.
This movie tried to be funny, but it just came off as desperate and unfunny.  I only laughed once during this comedy.  It was when Belushi was finding all the dead bodies.  Fisher did a good job in this movie, too bad she couldn't help save this movie.  And with that, I raise my lighter to light the candles on Carrie's cake.

I give this movie a disappointing 2 cakes out of 5.  I thought the combination of Belushi, Fisher, and 80's Hanks would be brilliant, but the writing just wasn't right for this amazing grouping.

Steve Coogan

Steve Coogan (left) and Amy Poehler in Hamlet 2 
Photo courtesy of http://www.filmschoolrejects.com/news/hamlet-2-will-rape-your-face-mind-and-soulin-a-good-way.php

Happy 46^th  birthday to our friend from across the pond, Steve Coogan.  Today I chose to watch a movie of his that has been on my "movies I want to watch" list for quite some time.  That movie is Hamlet 2, and no this movie is not a sequel.  
On with the movie.  I don't know where to start with this movie.  It was funny, had a good message, the casting was good, and Coogan was great!  
Coogan was able to hold his own with scene stealer Amy Poehler.  He didn't let her take over the scenes, which was good.  
The way Coogan carries himself and his reaction to things in this movie really brought the laughter full circle.  An example of this would be when the character Octavio says his name is "Heywood Jablowme" and Coogan thinks this is his real name.  So he calls him Heywood the whole movie, until Coogan goes over to "Heywood's" parents house and learns his name is really Octavio.  The expression on Coogan's face is priceless.
The songs in the play Hamlet 2 are so catchy that you can't help but tap along.  There is one song in particular that I can't get out of my head.  Its "Rock Me Sexy Jesus" and I am just going to say you're welcome for getting it stuck in your head right now.  You will also see Elisabeth Shue (who plays herself in the movie) in this clip in the audience and in the nurse outfit.
My favorite lines in this movie were "Raped in the face" which was repeated throughout the movie, and "You're a liar! Everyone has rain gutters!"  I don't know why I laughed so hard at the rain gutters quote, perhaps it was the delivery of it.  
And with that, I would like to raise my lighter to light the candles on Steve's cake.


I give this movie 3 ½ cakes out of 5.

June Allyson

June Allyson and David Niven in My Man Godfrey.
Photo courtesy of http://dawnschickflicks.blogspot.com/2010/12/my-man-godfrey-1957.html

Happy birthday to the late June Allyson.  Today she would have been 94.  She died in 2006 at the age of 88.   People might know her as Jo from Little Women (1949) or perhaps from the Depends commercials.  In honor of her birthday, I chose to watch her movie My Man Godfrey from 1957.

On with the movie.  I honestly don't know what to say about this movie...  It was horrible.  It was such a struggle to sit there and watch it.  June looked too old for her role.  I felt like she was trying to be the equivalent of fast talking, wise cracking Katharine Hepburn, but failed miserably.  The lines were poorly delivered by all, and the plot was boring and nonexistent.  To me, June seems more of a dramatic actress and shouldn't really do comedy.  But that is just basing it off of the two movies I have seen her in, Little Women and this one.  And with that, I raise my lighter to light the candles on June’s birthday cake.

Overall I give this movie a disappointing ½ a cake out of 5.  The only reason it got ½ was because of the maid, played by Jeff Donnell.  She had some lines in there that got a chuckle, which is more than I can say for the rest of the cast...